In a rather timely fashion (meaning in relation to Part 1 of this post), we recently attempted to upgrade to iTunes 9.0.Death. OK, that’s not exactly its official name, but for PC users, it might as well be. Once installed, this fantastic piece of software engineering, (sometimes referred to as a virus or malicious code) attacks your once-functioning iTunes interface and initiates the slow and painful process of making you regret having ever purchased Apple products.
Let me explain. First, if you plan to use iTunes 9.0.2.25, make sure you have never purchased or never wish to purchase and songs from iTunes. Why? Well, 9.0 offers the added convenience of never being able to load your purchased music onto your iPod again! And on top of that, you can forget using the iTunes store or authorizing your account, because that too will be met with failure. (Note: All of my Tips and emphasis today will be in Apple Red, as well as the word “Apple“)
TIP: You might want to have tech support standing by on the line when upgrading
With iTunes 9.0, the upgraded features are endless! When you upgrade your software, you can be sure that none of your playlists will function when you’ve removed 9.0 out of pure frustration and tried to roll back to an earlier version! Why? Like many upgraded versions of software, previous versions can’t open them. …And when you upgraded iTunes, your playlists were upgraded along with everything else. Now, if you organize using playlists like me, you are probably really happy right now.
But wait, for a limited time offer, you can completely reformat your iPod once it starts working improperly too!
Well, that’s really not an option, I guess… But you still get to do it. Who cares, anyway? None of the songs you recently purchased and hadn’t had time to load will be there anyway.
While we’re on the subject, APPLE, here are a few other great features that have no doubt continued on for another software revision. I will present these features in the form of a question. You know, like Jeopardy (sort of)… A term my PC is now quite familiar with:
1) A: Because we would be offering a level of convenience to customers that we are not prepared to offer. Q: Why is it so hard to make an interface that allows you to download from your iPod to your computer inside of iTunes?
2) A: This is required to make you feel like paying too much for a Mac would be worth it, as the downloads couldn’t be this large for them too. Q: Why is it that your software loads like it is the size of Windows (your favorite product, I’m sure) and needs to be “upgraded” every-other week?… To another full 88 Giga-watt version.
3) A: Because we can… Q: Why does my iPod turn on when I am inserting the headphones? …Even when locked. What possible use could that have besides annoying your customers?
4) A: Yes, and as stated, the world. Q: Do you intentionally seek to alienate PC users in order to take over the world? Come on, you already have the movie industry in your back pocket… What more do you want?
5) A: Jello. Q: Is iTunes 9.0 in fact a virus intended to maliciously destroy all PCs everywhere?
And finally:
6) A: We don’t care about your Apples, none of our software will work right with it anyway. If you really want to take over the industry, try selling your products for a reasonable price and making them 100% compatible with PC software. That means, there shouldn’t be PC and MAC versions. There should just be one version that works. Really, you should just blame Steve Jobs for letting Bill Gates steal the original good ideas from Apple in the first place… and move on with life. Q: Will you just admit, that stability of a platform really means nothing to a public that uses PCs as a vast majority?
OK, I am not really as bitter as this post might lead one to believe, but it was fun venting for a while. Seriously, though… Before you release new versions of your software, give your PC-user rivals the courtesy of having tested it thoroughly beforehand. We don’t want to be your beta-testers, Apple. I’d hate to think there is going to be a bad one in every bunch.